"Ladies first," a classic gentleman's line. We've heard of this ever since we can remember. It was like a pick-up line that was known everywhere when the traditional chivalry was very much alive. These days it is not that popular. Some independent women might even raise their brows asking what did they do to deserve the special treatment. What are those special treatments?
An article entitled Practicality of Gentlemanly Acts by Eduardo Garcia from the site Gentlemenhood, states that chivalrous acts such as opening a door for a lady, walking a lady to her door, pulling out chairs, paying, helping a lady into and out of a car, offering a lady a jacket, and offering a lady a seat in public transportation, started from two reasons: the over-elaborate clothing of women used to wear and the role of men as bodyguards. Women used to wear huge skirts that made it difficult for them to reach the door's handle. This is why men hold doors for women, pull out chairs for them, and help them get in and out of the car. Also as bodyguards, when men open and hold the doors, they could scan or look into the environment keeping the women safe. The ladies can open and hold doors, pull out their own chairs, when a man offers or does it for her, this doesn't mean that she can't do it by herself. Chivalry is a tradition and we haven't totally gotten rid of it.
Eduardo said, "I know that most of the comments are based on how the lady is dressed, and you can simply say it’s her problem, that she chose to dress that way. You might think that it was her choice to wear heals, or a strapless dress, or short skirt. Yes, it was her decision. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be considerate." Although we no longer wear over-elaborated clothing and men are not really expected to act like bodyguards, we have to admit that chivalry is good and it wouldn't hurt to offer sincere gestures. The gentlemen were greatly appreciated before. Now they are rare because they are appreciated less.
According to the article Random Acts of "Knight"ness by Jessika Shanon from the site Chivalry Today, women should also respect chivalry. Even though women do not really need or want assistance, women are strong and independent, sometimes when men are being chivalrous towards them they feel like their independence is being taken away from them--the world without chivalry is unimaginable. Even chivalry starts with women. Mothers are the ones who teach their sons to treat girls respectfully. It is also important for them to teach their daughters to treat boys respectfully. There has been a mentality that because women were not treated equally in history, chivalry is a way to make up for their suffering and suppression. It's not supposed to be like that.
Jessika said, "Chivalry should be saved because it maintains a very respectable value system where people practice sincere gestures and random acts of kindness." I believe it is good and exists for good reason. Who wouldn't want sincere gestures? Isn't this worth saving?
Having read these two articles, we can conclude that chivalrous acts such as opening and holding out doors for women, pulling their chair, offering seat to them in public transportation, offering them your jackets, helping them get in and out of the car--are sincere gestures. Chivalry doesn't mean that men see women as weak so they help them or that they owe them for things that happened in the past. It is simply respect and kindness that we should all gladly offer.
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